Archive | 1:15 pm

a tale of urinary incontinence to start your weekend

22 Feb

John’s a little bit of a snob.  Having spent five years of his adolescence in Italy, he refuses to say words like “mozzarella” in good ol’ American English, pronouncing it instead, “Moh-tsa-rell-llaaa.”  Be careful when speaking words like “bruschetta” in his presence.  I think it’s ridiculous, considering a good part of our language is derived from latin/romance languages, and you don’t hear everyone speaking as though he’s fresh off the Mediterranean boat.

He’s also a bit of a caricature, and I’m pretty damn good at imitating him.  So when he started talking about JAMA (the Journal of the American Medical Association) and kept pronouncing it as though it rhymed with llama, I had to step in: “Oh, I think I’ll read an article from Jah-Mah while nibbling a bit on my moh-tsa-rel-la.”  Hunh.  It was funnier in the moment.  So he starts laughing, in his twitchy, convulsive, hysterical way, and I get to laughing…then he laughs harder, and I laugh harder.  Finally he squeaks out: “You’re peeing yourself, just a little, right?”

Apparently my stress incontinence post-delivery of an 8 lb 3 oz chunk has created a meter stick for gauging humor.  And I was so good about doing my kegels.