As I’m sure you can tell, my posts have been a little uninspired recently. I’ve hit that point in studying where I’m a little over it, and I’m just making myself hammer through practice questions because the ticking clock of the q-bank is the only thing that keeps me moving. Now I understand why my friends told me to absolutely not spend more than six weeks studying for this exam. I mean, I could spend A YEAR studying and still not feel ready, I could drive myself crazy. So, I’ll just get it done on the 29th and move on. I hope that some of the pictures of the cute beefcake have been good enough distraction.
This is going to sound awful. Yesterday I spent a couple hours in a Starbucks waiting for the library to open, and these two girls at the table next to me were studying for the MCAT. One of them started crying out of frustration and stress. I offered a few go-get-’em words that I’m sure more annoyed than motivated them, but I left the conversation feeling a little better. (I know, I know, it’s horrible for other’s anxiety to help lessen one’s own but, still, thank God I’m not studying for the MCAT.) I keep thinking about the med students I would see when I was studying for the MCAT in 2008 (has it been five years?!), really thinking that they had made it. And then I think about how many tears I cried over that damn test. (My husband is a saint.) The boards aren’t over yet, but I don’t have the same sinking feeling of impending doom (well, John will probably remind me of when I did, in fact, burst into tears a week and a half ago…but I’m over it, really), even if I still have some practice tests where I get fewer correct than what the laws of probability would assume if I had guessed on all of them.
My studying is bookend-ed with Ari rituals, like sitting on the kitchen floor eating over-easy eggs before the sun’s come up, and watching her do crazy shit like pull herself up to standing, or wrap her arms around my legs when I come to pick her up (heart to floor). Oh, and her excited panting has been replaced by a gorilla like, deep: “Hoo! Hoo!” Must get on video.
Helping mama eat up them boards! (That’s the binding of the First Aid for the USMLE Step 1.)
anna in med school 
I’m studying for the MCAT this summer, and although I’m not quite at the crying part yet, I probably will be after taking another practice test tomorrow. I’m sure that those girls appreciated what you told them — you’re inspirational. I love following your blog and knowing I’m not alone in studying all day with no human contact. Good luck on step 1!
Hi Carrie!
Oh goodness, I really hope that my comments didn’t create any additional anxiety! If so, I apologize. People respond differently, but it always helped me to know that the MCAT was sort of the worst of it (at least for a lot of people). Soon you’ll be past it, and it’ll feel amazing! I wish you the very best of luck, and please let me know if there is anything I can offer that might be of help.
Thank you so much for your kind words and well wishes–truly, you made my night!
take care, anna
Don’t worry Anna! We all burst into tears at some point while studying for that test… just ask Ellen about me 🙂 You will get through it and you will do great!!! Also you have the cutest baby in existence…!
If that baby were any more adorable, I think I’d puke. 😉 Also, I want to hear the HOO HOO video. Somebody has to catch that. Don’t gorillas make that noise?